I know that this is going to sound dumb, so if you don't want to read it, please don't!
I lost Joy, my beloved stuffed pig.
Next Tuesday, it will be a month that I have been without Joy. I haven't been able to blog about it until now because I really try not to think about it a lot. I lost her in the airport on January 8, the day we left for Glendale (of course, we didn't get there that day haha). I had her in my bag at the gate, I remember, but somehow she didn't make it on the plane.
So while in the air, I realized Joy was no longer tucked safely in my carry-on bag as I thought. Philip and I looked all around and asked everyone around us if they had seen her, but no one had. And that's when the tears started to fall. A special thank you to Philip for comforting me throughout this. I was so upset and he was so sweet about it and didn't tell me once that it was dumb for a 20 year old to be bawling her eyes out about the loss of a stuffed pig.
But, Joy was not just a stuffed pig. She was my companion for over 10 years. I'm sure that when my Mewmaw and Gramps gave me a stuffed pig that year for Christmas, they had no idea what she would come to mean to me. She dried many a tear, let me hold on to her every single night while I slept, traveled all across the United States and even to Mexico with me, let me rub her tags so much when I was nervous or upset about something that they were reduced to single strings, and I will admit, even listened to some of my problems.
It's true that God gives and takes away. He blessed me by giving me Joy, and now, as much as I wish I wasn't typing this, He has taken her away from me.
So Joy, wherever you are, I hope you know that you gave me so much of what I named you when I unwrapped you 11 Christmases ago. I hope you know that as I type this, I have tears streaming down my face and that every night when I go to bed I still miss you and wish you were with me. You were there for me through everything and now I have to accept that you are not here for me to be crying on right now. So now I guess if you can't be with me, the best that I can hope for you is that you're bringing joy to another little girl that needs you more than I do right now.
I will always love you, Joy, and not a day will go by that I won't miss you.
-Rachel
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